I love autumn

Oooh Autumn and trees. Leaves scattered all over the sidewalk. Crunching. But I hate the people who just crunch them because they're bored or because they hate the leaves. I hate them. Crush the leaves because you love the sound, because you love the season. Get it right!

What a Monday. I was on edge in class because I thought she graded my test and found out I didn't really take it haha. But nah, she didn't. Lab was easy. I let my two partners do the work while I recorded and did the calculations. That class is hard.

things I realized on the walk to my car:
Eh, all I am is another person trying to find reason. I'm not always right, I hate to be wrong. I spend my time obsessing over details. I can't wait to step into the bigger picture. I live in the hope for the future. All I am is another person, figuring out what the point is, and if I'm doing this right.

It was fun hanging out with Kathleen today. I haven't seen my cousins in hella long. I only see Manong and Christine, and Antoine when he secretly drives here. (my myspace top 8 is in the order of who i last saw btw). But yeah.

Heroes is a dope show.

So I was looking for my The Places You Have Come To Fear the Most CD (which I burned a long time ago when I borrowed it from the library) and I found a whole bunch of CDs I made in high school. Crazy. Shit I completely forgot about. But shit I used to love. Like, remember when I used to love "Sweetness" and "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World? Or remember that Story of the Year song that killed me? And I found the "Reminds me of the Etas" mix. Hah. I feel like I'm in high school. Being home and the temperature outside. I feel like tonight I will sleep in layers of clothing, but still cold under the blankets. And in the morning I'll wake up late and end up late for school. Before I get to the shower, I'll want to turn on the heater so that it's warm when I come out.

It's a weird, familiar feeling. I never thought I'd have to be here during the fall again like this. Procrastinating on homework. Typical me. But somehow I have the ability to look back.

That's me.

Woot, Brand New tomorrow. Cross that off the list of bands that I've loved since forever. Finally get to see them after I missed them the first time around.

I'm staring back. Standing still. Aching to move forward.