Sucker for sweet talkers

hey how are you,
i think i might explode,
i found a box, which said "open and choose",
you'll find 2 notes,
1 says "you might succeed",
the other reads, "you'll ruin everything"
you want them to like all the things you've said,
you're still talking backwards and off your head,
been running in circles for way too long,
i hope your corporation dies.
i'm sorry for things,
sorry for what's been said,
i watched them all,
while they burned it down
Moneen "This Is All Bigger Than Us"

Yeah, so I'm a little irritable. I'm a little depressed. I'm a little manic. Comes and goes.

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket, and that basket is that destruction is a form of creation. So for all the things I am destroying, I pray to God that I create something better from them.

I will not point fingers, I will not hold on, I will not beg, I will not hate this summer anymore, I will not look back. What you know, is only what is now. And what is now? Now is accumulation. It's easier than looking back. It's got that element. And it has the anticipation of what comes next. Now is the embodiement of the past, present, and future. So why live in the past or future, when you can live now? That's what I think, anyway.

Trying to write a song. Noemi says start with the chorus. Gotta think more. Agh.

One more week. Then the craziness starts. Can't help feelin alone with that shit. Oh well, that's the way it is. That's what happens when you fuck up the last two years of your life, take note of that, kiddos. Don't diddle daddle. Haha. Do your shit and do it well. Does it matter if you don't know what to do with your life? Fuck the future! Charge at that shit, charge at it with your hands full of success instead of failure, and you'll be alright. I promise. And everyone knows I hate to break those. So I don't.

One more time now. This summer sucks. And I'm done. Because it's almost over.

One more thing to look forward to. COUSIN FUN DAY 06!!! Fourth annual, bitches. Till the day I die.

I think I'm going to sign up for netflix. I've been renting a lot lately and buying DVDs. Well, my life in a nutshell.

actually life in a nutshell: work, sleep late, wake late. work. Thats this week. someone save me. And will anyone? No. Hah. Fuck you and your words, your promises, your friendship based on your own convenience. Sick of it. I said I'd do anything...but would you? That's the clencher. My whole life, I just needed some reciprocation. And no, I've never gotten it, so no I will not subject myself to shit where I won't get that in return anymore. So fuck you. Hah.

Little angry.