We're burning bridges down.

I wish I could burn the bridges down. Ya know...because I'm tired of them. They're too damn long to cross. Fuckin broken steps on the way...and somehow I have to get over that...how. Why. When. Man I am so fuckin tired of everything, especially pledging. I hate to say it, because I love it, and I love my pledge sisters, but shit. I get soooo much shit for that. It's so fuckin hard. I mean, fuckin A. No one at home is supporting me, they don't think it means much, but fuck, it means a lot, and fuck, I didn't expect it to either! What the fuck! I hate having to defend myself, and having to explain myself, and having to lie. Damn, everyday I get more and more discouraged. I'd like to just go on, keep my head up, but it's harder than it sounds. I can't do it. Because like it or not, I let their words get to me. Weak like that. What the fuck ever. But fuck, I'm so angry. Because I'm so stressed, and all they can do is add, what the fuck, there's no fuckin support. No one wants to hear it either, so it just makes me feel more alone. Man... I don't know anymore...is it worth it...what the fuck am I doing? Man, I had it, now I lost it...I don't know anything...

Damn...if you could shoot me. If you could just leave me. If you could just make it all go away.

Today I was inspired and discouraged. So that inspiration has gone to waste until next time...I'm sure the words will just appear somewhere...fix it.

Shoot me.