Crawling toward the finish line

"I know I should be brave, but I'm just too afraid of all this change...and its too hard to focus through all this doubt, i keep making these to-do lists, but nothing gets crossed out." -Bright Eyes "Nothing Gets Crossed Out"

Someone slap me in the face because Bright Eyes takes all the words out of my mouth for me. Thanks Bright Eyes for making me feel normal. Well, I think I'm consumed with Ren Faire anxiety. Today I came home, took Jensen out, started strumming, started singing, and I came up with the drunk song. Two more to go. One about Anne Boleyn maybe. One about Henry or maybe just a tune to go with words. I think maybe being a minstrel will be good fun. And then the dancing...oh man...how is it that I'm Filipino...I have no rhythym at all. Those folk dances are lost on me. And other types of dancing are no different. Perhaps its all this rock music. 1, 4, 5's. I don't know. Anyway. I'm really proud of my drunk song. I must go and tell Roger tomorrow morning.

Well...its really weird because it seems like everything is going to end, but it doesn't really feel any different. Nothing is slowing down except for me. Same amount of work and stuff, nothing changes...I'm just getting lazy. Get home and pass out on the couch. Don't do homework. Just sleep. How I've come to love sleep. I regret not getting a lot of sleep when I was younger. If there were time machines, I would own one and it would be worn out by now. But I guess that goes for everyone.

Today was my cousin's birthday. I went with my sister to his house for dinner after I took my nap. It was cool. We watched the Sharks game. Go Sharks! I'm no fan of hockey, but I've got some pride for this city...some...not a lot. But yeah. Geez...they're all growing up so fast. I was playing with my little cousin Miranda and I realized in about a couple months she probably won't be the same little kid. I'm like a sentimental mother now. I think I had a dream I was one and that's why I'm like this right now... dude.

I keep falling asleep in school and I only have five classes and get out of lunch. There's something wrong with that. So I think I will hit the sack.

P.S. I need to get rid of this gut. And I learned what a pooch was. So that's what its called.