Victoria's secret
Yesterday, I was sitting down watching TV with my sister and my cousin, and my mom was in the kitchen on the phone or something, and then we saw the commercial for the Victoria's Secret Semi-Annual Bra and Panty Sale.
ME: Mom! Victoria's Secret Semi-Annual Sale starts tomorrow!
MY SISTER: Yeah let's go get some sexy bras and panties!
MOM: Why?
ME: So we can get some sexy bras and panties!
MOM: You can save the sexy until you have a husband. You don't have to be sexy right now.
ME: But we need to sexy in order to attract a husband.
MOM: Your husband will love you for who you are, no matter what you look like.
ME: Yeah, a sexy vixen.
(MOM leaves the room.)
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Then today I was looking for my dad's Forrest Gump tape because I wanted to watch it since we watched in Catollico's class and my friend called about it.
ME: Mom, I'm looking for Forrest Gump.
MOM: Okay.
ME: (looking in my parents' room) You don't have porno in here right?
MOM: No....(few seconds later) If we do it isn't mine.
ME: (in my mind) PSH yeah right, if I find that shit, I'm watching it.
(A few minutes later when my mom was about ready to leave for work. I was still looking in their room for the tape.)
MOM: Vanessa, if you find something, don't watch it.
ME: (in my mind) Damnit.
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