Baby, let me explain...

Yesterday's blog was just a big brain fart, and if you would just disregard it, that would be fine. I think the things I surround myself with are so melancholy. I take refuge in movies that make me cry to no end, I listen to sappy songs about things lost and longed for, even the books I read are so tragic and hopeless...I think its just my condition. Some people love to party and surround themselves with elements of that lifestyle. I guess I'm meant to always be in check like this...happy followed by sad, because if there wasn't any sad, there wouldn't be any happy. That's my rationalization anyway. Then again, "this head, this heart, was breaking away from the start" (Count the Stars- "Pictures"). That's my favorite line in the whole wide world.

I've been overplaying that song, and if you get the chance, I say you download it.

Seniors!

I guess we're seniors? Not quite. About ten days left, right? Wow. Seriously, wow. Life is starting...and when I mean life...I mean no more asking parents to make your decisions...we own. Heh. When I look back at this year, I'll think of slaving myself...totally hating myself for taking these classes, but then this year, I didn't have as much lows...you know? If you could read my journal, before this year, you'd read a lot of melancholy shit. But this year...I don't know. Something. Maybe I let loose. Maybe I just don't care anymore. Whatever it is...I'm glad it happened. And yesterday was such a temporary feeling...

I really need a job. Not even funny. I'm desperate, I'm even considering going to the mall. Duuuude. But if I were to get a job at the mall I'd like it to be at American Eagle =) Duuuuude. And my sister and I are going to spend some quality getting straightened out. Previous summers, it would be acceptable to just wake up hella late, not help with the housework, and watch TV all day...but I don't want to do that anymore. It makes me feel ashamed to even call myself a part of this family when I don't contribute. So my sister and I are going to help out, and we're going to hang out, and we're going to shed some pounds together.

Summer is almost beginning, but I can feel it slip away. Did you know that two weeks after we get off school, it'll be July? Wow...July. I love my June. If June were a man, I bet he'd be hella hunky. Haha. I'm fantasizing about a month...how crazy is that? Well anyway, what's the count? 9! 9! 9! I love this.