A Comic Approach: My Charlie Brown/Dawson's Creek Fan Fiction

Charlie Brown was the ideal, do-the-right-thing, boy next door. He was neat. He had goals. All three of his hairs were combed perfectly to the side. This kid had dreams. This kid was going somewhere; but he wasn't going alone. There was his dog (or dawg, if you prefer), Snoopy and his homie home-home-homie Linus. He was going to Hollywood, baby. The place where you either make it or you have to be a waitress or a prostitute working for low pay and and balding business men with sad and mediocre lives.

For the past five years of their short existences, he was the mejor amigo of Linus. Yes, Linus was needy. Yes, he carried around his security blanket like he was still a baby. But so what? They were inseparable; a team. They were perfectly matched together, as if God himself could not have hoped for such a likely pair.

One day, as Charlie Brown was outside documenting the sounds that various birds generate, he spied a golden-haired beauty from across the yard. His old Hi8 was addicted to this vision of perfection. I'm sure this is where his mind gets very PG-13. As she approached him with a smile, it escalated towards R.

"Hi, I'm Ren Dinley," she introduces herself.

Speechless, he could not put his Hi8 down. The focus was tightly fixed on her. Oh, how I long to say, "Hi, I'm Charlie Brown. Welcome to Charlie's Creek., he thought.

Snoopy barked.

The trance was broken. He stroked his perfect three hairs away from his forehead. "I'm Charlie Brown. Just move here?"

You idiot.

Before they could continue their awkward conversation, Linus trotted over (with his security blanket). Suddenly, the moment became even more tense. Linus could not withhold his love for Charlie Brown. Now, with the arrival of this blonde homewrecker, their relationship was being threatened.

Will they make it? Will Linus confess his feelings for Charlie Brown? Or will Charlie Brown go out with that blonde chick? If he does will he get her pregnant? Do you think he'll make it in Hollywood? Well, if he doesn't, maybe he should just move somewhere on the outskirts...or maybe Chico...or maybe he can just not do any of this stuff and become a doctor...or a lawyer...yeah, he can be Charlie "Cochran" Brown, baby...yeah....